you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Randomize
