My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
