I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
