My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
