I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
