that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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