i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
