Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize