It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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