But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Randomize
