party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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