please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
In other news, I just burned my penis
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
