before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Randomize
