Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
