ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Randomize
