I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Come share oat with me in your robe
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
