Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
another moral hangover. fuck.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
