You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
