From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
