she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I will be naked everywhere
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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