oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
