I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
