After last night, I could never be a politician.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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