Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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