the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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