They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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