So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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