You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
