Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
