I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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