Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
