nut hugger
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize