I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
