HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
