Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize