I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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