so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize