One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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