32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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