I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
Randomize
