we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
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