This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
