The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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