Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
You did what with his pubic hair?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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