girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize