I wish I only lived at night.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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