yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize