He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize