My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
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