His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
