OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
